The I Word

I thought I’d post a quick little update about my 32-week appointment, as I am now freaking out about little time left there is…

Baby is still head down and had a lovely heartbeat of 150 bpm.

I’m just measuring huge. Around 36 weeks. And because I don’t have high blood pressure or gestational diabetes, we are going to do a growth scan at 36 weeks to see if a giant baby is the cause. Dr. Ash (sorry Denise, I was wrong who I had today!) was wonderful and said that we wouldn’t do anything before I was full term. She also said at 22 weeks, the baby was measuring at the 43rd percentile and the 26th week appointment in the 95th, so it could just be we caught him in a growth spurt. Or the growth spurt hasn’t stopped!

As well, she mentioned in the third trimester, measurements can be off a pound either way. But if I go in and am looking like there is a 9 pound baby in there, we will induce at 37 weeks. EEK.

That’s five weeks away. FIVE. I am so not ready. I’m excited and anxious to see him, but I want everything ok. I really need to get my head out of my ass and get going on everything.

Ah-hee ah-hee ah-hee a-who

And so goes the shallow breathing technique for labor, which we learned last night at our first and only birthing class.

Being the procrastinator that I am, all the express classes were booked. That is, until Jan. 17 and with as big as I am, I didn’t want to cut it that close. Also, I didn’t want to spend four weeks in classes. So we went with a private class.

It was good. As birthing classes go. We just have to borrow from our hospital the birthing videos, so my hubby can see an actual birth.

But the whole time we were there, I couldn’t believe we were there. The idea of us actually having a baby and me giving birth? It’s crazy.

We also got a tour of their remodeled birthing wing and recovery area. It was surreal. I remember being there for my brother’s birth in 1990. The colors are different, no more mauve and green, but the layout of the floor is essentially the same. And then it made me think of my mom giving birth and getting to see him emerge into the world, and now I am doing the same! I have memories of getting my mom ice chips. It was just crazy.

I know, crazy is my word of the day and we all should scream like Pee Wee’s Playhouse when I say it, but seriously. I am so not prepared.

I need to make a list of all the things I need to do, I need to meet with the nurse for our “Birth Day Wishes,” which spells out who will be in the room, how much attention I want from the nurses, etc. Surprisingly, my mom wants to be in the room. And it’s a surprise because my mom can’t stand to see her children in pain. Seriously, she couldn’t see her daughters get their ears pierced. But my hubs and I think we just want medical personnel and each other. I’ve got too much family and don’t want to pick and choose. They can see me after. And as if they want to actually see me…

But it is really happening.

I had my first shower this week, my work one, followed up with my family and friends one Saturday. The best part of my shower was the cake. Seriously, Kin.g Soo.pe.rs rocks the poppyseed cake with a buttercream frosting. MMmmm. But even better? What the cake said.

Since we found out the sex of the baby, EVERYONE has asked us his name. We have a short list, and we’ve shared that with friends and family only to have them give comments, come up with new names, tell us what ethnicity that name is, etc. So we just started telling everyone his name would be as follows:

I just died laughing when I saw it.  As everyone at work knows him by this name. But, apparently, the bakery lady was confused, according to my coworker. I can’t imagine why?! But we think it works. And we decided we won’t tell anyone his real name until Th.or Pa.blo is here.

*And to the question I had been asked in a not-so-nice comment, the private class cost us $130. Yes, money is tight with my hubby being out of work and only getting unemployment. But we have a little savings, he’s not spending money on gas and waiting for the cheaper, $70 class until I’m considered full term was not an option for us. If I didn’t have an extra $60 to spend I’d really, really be worried. 

And the comment about him being brittle and not able to knock me up? Um, we don’t know if he can or can’t. We did IVF for one reason alone - GENETICS. But, apparently, you’d rather say really rude things, be mean and not nice. Thanks poophead.

Better, with photo

Thanks to all who commented about my poopness. I am feeling better. And I do hope I didn’t offend any of my Colorado girls. (Can you tell I’m a Libra who likes balance in her life and everyone happy?)

I had my 30-week checkup today. Thrilling drive in the snow, especially seeing cars slide down the hill out of the parking lot.

As for me, I am still huge. I am measuring around 35 weeks. My doctor said I shouldn’t worry though, as there is a three-week variance with that, so really, I am only like oh two weeks ahead. And the little guy, according to last u/s is in the 95th percentile. It could also be that because I’ve got plenty of fluid in there and I wasn’t a petite flower when I got preggers. So I am trying not to worry. Even though I could be more likely to give birth before my due date.

His heartbeat was a good 140 and my blood pressure, after a second check, was 112/80. Phew.

All is well. It’s crazy though that I will go every two weeks until week 36. Then every week thereafter. And I start getting internal checks at week 36. I don’t know if I am ready for this. Maybe no one is, but I really feel like I should have more of my shit together in terms of actually visualizing bringing a baby home.

I also got freaked out at the preterm labor flyer they gave me. Ack. But I’ll manage. Now I’ll just be obsessive to see if I am having contractions… I’m such a dork.

Speaking of dorkiness, my most recent photo.

*Oh, Denise I am thinking of you. I heard the doctor and the nurse talking (yes, I’m nosy) about a patient having a NST. I don’t know if it was you or not but you haven’t updated so I’m sending positive thoughts!

30 Weeks

Yesterday I hit the 30-week milestone. I still can’t quite believe it. All this time I’ve been counting the weeks upward and now it’s a countdown.

Mind you, I have yet to buy a diaper, set up a crib or anything like that. But I am happy with my little wiggly worm. Even though, I have a nice new set of stretch marks across my belly. C’est la vie. I knew it would happen, however. I’ve got them from puberty, so not from pregnancy would have been a major surprise.

Otherwise, things are mellow at the house now. The in-laws left on Monday to spend Christmas with my sister in law and niece. Only the seventh Christmas spent with her in the nine years that my hubby has lived here. But I’m not bitter. Ok, I lie. I’m in a funky yuck mood.

My random tangent rant. I think I need more female friends. I’ve got a number in Texas and here. But looking at my RSVP list for my baby shower is quite sad. Neither of my aunts are coming. Nice. My cousin has a cheerleading competition and the other has a party at 6 that night. My MIL and SIL aren’t coming. My stepsister isn’t, but she doesn’t like my sister and I, so it’s not a surprise. It’s just sucky. And my Colorado Blogger girls, please don’t be offended I didn’t invite you guys. I know you but not really in a social, outside the world of IVF, etc. world. If that makes any sense. And I didn’t want to seem like a present-grubbing kind of girl and to invite you, just because. Or to force you to endure an afternoon with my family that does show up. So I hope I didn’t offend you gals.

But seriously, that’s what I feel like. A present whore. I look at my registry and get sad at all the stuff there is to buy. Maybe it’s the hubby being temporarily unemployed, and thinking of what we have to buy. Or the fact that no one on either side has ever offered to help with IVF bills, etc. I am just overwhelmed. It doesn’t help too that work is miserable, thank you Mr. Recession, and I really want February to speed up and arrive. 

What a bitch fest about seriously inconsequential stuff huh?

I do have my latest appointment coming up tomorrow. But that is a boring one, no ultrasound. Boo. I am fearful I won’t get actually another one for the duration of the pregnancy. That’s crazy. Next week, childbirth class. And I’m trying not to think about the pooping while pushing thing Nancy has made me scared of…

I will try and update tomorrow with news from the appointment, a belly shot and a happier Jen. The one you all know. And maybe love.