Thanks for nothing…

I was hoping for some good news today. Or maybe just a little hope.

Instead, I feel like I got a punch to the gut.

I am not quite sure where to begin.

Thanks to the number of embryos we’ve put back in (8) and the number of live births(1), Dr. G. suggests we do chromosomal screening. So we can do CCS with PGS, it is just the CCS we would do is PCR. I’ve yet to figure out all acronyms but it means we would test all 23 chromosomes for abnormalities, taking half of what they biposy for OI, the other for the CCS/PCR thing (they no longer do micro array or CGH).

Mind you, all I heard in my head was what a failure I was… He was talking about usually at day 5 we have 6 unaffected embryos but with our less-than-stellar success at pregnancy with healthy embryos that we might have 2, 1 or none to transfer doing the new testing.

Then he had to mention when we started this whole thing, who’d have thought we’d be talking chromosomal testing, we were just doing it for single-gene testing.

So at this point I am not only thinking what little odds of success he seems to be giving me but also that I am going to have to come up with $25,000 somehow to even try.

Apparently, PGD disqualifies me from EVERY clinical study. And insurance? My secondary insurance covers up to 15k . The billing gal explained to me what they can bill to insurance from the cycle. A whopping 3k.! (And I’d have to ditch my primary insurance for them to bill directly my primary…) Nothing done on the FLC side is covered. I can send it after its all said and done and out of pocket, but who knows what would be paid. So what is the point of insurance with coverage at CCRM? And we are still finishing off paying the shared-risk loan we have so getting another isn’t feasible to cover the costs…

As well, I loved them telling me that I will be grandfathered in but they don’t do single-gene testing transfers anymore. That’s right. The clinic we used to do the testing would do our transfer. If you start with CCRM now, you go to Chicago, where that lab/clinic is, for the transfer. Really? At least that is one good thing to come out of today, I don’t have to fly across the country for transfer and bed rest…

I am just speechless. I don’t know what to think or to feel.

Obviously my ranting shows that.

I was hoping to come out of there feeling positive moving forward. Now, I am left with more questions. More worries. And really not feeling that moving forward will result in the sibling we want for O.

What other option do we have though?

None. And that’s maybe what sucks the most.

 

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3 Responses to “Thanks for nothing…”

  1. Serenity Says:

    Ugh. I don’t know what to tell you, but if it were me, I’d be thinking about a second opinion. Only because that seems like a LOT of money to be dropping on something that might really not give you that much more information. Honestly, I’ve had 7 transfers and 1 live birth, and my doctor has ALWAYS been optimistic about our chances of getting pg the next time. You really only need ONE embryo to stick, and the issue could be implantation as much as it could be embryo quality. He’s guessing, and it sounds like it’s a LOT of money if he’s guessing wrong, you know?

    Might be worth another opinion just to make sure someone else, independent, thinks the same thing.

    Hugs hon. I’m sorry the appointment gave you a lot more questions than answers.

    xoxo

  2. Lois Lane Says:

    Oh my friend…I am so sorry for the heartache and the great unknown…its so hard. I wish I had more answers for you. We were *this* close to doing PGD the 2nd round..and if I ever did IVF again, I know my RE would suggest it–but its such a big $$ commitment with not much guarantee–along the lines of what Serenity was saying.

    Here for you any way you need me!

  3. LetThereBeSims Says:

    Thats a tough decision. We are embarking on IVF # 3 and first time doing PGD at CCRM. We are so scared of throwing our hard earned dollars away. It is such a gamble. I recently discovered your blog and gave you a Blog Award. Check it out on my site:

    http://wishingforthegiftoflife.blogspot.com/

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