Wait and see…

I knew – absolutely knew – that my doctor would call with biopsy results on my deadline. So instead of working, I’ve got this now weird feeling in my tummy of fear and hope, and I may throw up.

So the biopsy results show two samples (I guess) of CIM 3. It is what she expected here. What that means, I don’t know. But I really didn’t feel like asking all these questions of my cervix with my office mate listening in. Not that she cares, but I do. Then there is some question of a positive margin, that she may have not gone deep enough with the LEEP. But, since she burns the base (ah, the memories of wearing the surgical mask and hearing dentist-like noises in my coochie…) she is hopeful she got it all.

Awesome. So we have to wait and see. She’s very optimistic but we just have to wait until the next pap. In June. To know for sure.

Aaargh. It is like waiting to find out if my hubby’s OI mutation could be positively identified. If I know one way or another, I could make plans. This in-limbo state sucks. Because I was getting my hopes up that April I would go in for my follow-up LEEP exam and she would say I’m healing great, blah blah. In May, I’d go in for the hysteroscopy. In June, I’d have the clean pap. And maybe, July, start this IVF thing. Yeah well. My uterus on hold. What’s new?

And, seriously, this is the positive me typing?


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